Many Teens are Saying "No."

Don't be fooled into thinking most teenagers are having sex.  They aren't!  There's a lot to know and think about before you decide to say "yes" to having sex.

"You Are More Than Feelings"

• Sexual feelings can be pretty strong!  so think before you act.  think about your future.  Think about the consequences.
• Think about yourself!  Ask yourself, "Is it better to wait for sex with my life partner?"
• STDs can be painful.  They can make it impossible to have a baby.  Some are incurable, and some may even cause death.
• Face it!  Sex for teens is pretty risky to your body, feelings, and future!

"You Are More Than Just a Body"

• During the teen years, you may be strongly attracted to another person.  Your body may send you strong messages that make you want to get closer to that person.  But your body won't tell you how having sex now may harm you.
• Almost 1,000,000 teens become pregnant each year.  Abstinence - not having sex - is the only 100% sure way to protect against the risk of pregnancy.
• Teens are more likely to have problems during pregnancy.
• Babies of young, teen mothers are more likely to be born with serious health problems.
• Sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) are at epidemic levels.  Abstinence - not having sex - is the most effective way to avoid herpes, syphilis, gonorrhea, human papillomavirus (HPV), chlamydia, and HIV/AIDS.  One in four teens who has sex gets an STD.

Answer these questions honestly "YES"?  or "NO"?

• When I get married, will I be glad I waited to have sex?
• Would my parents approve of my having sex now?
• If I have a child, am I responsible enough to provide for its emotional and financial support?
• If the relationship breaks up, will I be glad I had sex with this person?
• Am I sure no one is pushing me into having sex?
• Do I know how to tell my partner I don't want to have sex now?
• Am I absolutely sure my partner is not infected with an STD including HIV/AIDS?

If you answered "NO" to any of these questions, then you should WAIT!

Decisions about sex will be some of the most important decisions you'll ever make, so think before you act.

• There are different ways to show affection for another person without having sex.
• Try to avoid situations where sexual feelings become strong.  "Stopping" is much harder then.
• Talk about your feelings and what seems right for you.
• Stay busy with sports and group activites.
• If you and your partner can't agree, then maybe you need to find someone else whose beliefs are closer to your own.

 

What should I know about pressure?

"Be popular, Be part of the in-crowd, Be a man/ be a woman, Everybody's doing it, Sex is fun, If it feels good do it..."

These ideas come from everywhere -  advertising, friends, movies, TV shows, songs, and books....

BUT STOP AND THINK!

Will having sex really make you more popular, more mature, or more desirable?  Probably not.  In fact, having sex may even cause your partner to lose interest.  The one sure thing about having sex is that you may be in for problems you don't want to deal with.

What should I know about boy/ girl relationships?

They are great...but good relationships don't develop overnight.  They take time.  Sex is not what makes a relationship work.  Watch out for lines like, "If you care about me, you'll have sex with me."

• You don't have to have sex with someone to prove you like or love them.
• Sex should never be used to pay someone back for something...all you have to say is, "Thank-you."
• Sharing time, thoughts, beliefs, feelings, and most of all mutual respect, is what makes a relationship strong.
• Saying "No" can be the best way to say "I love you."

 

What should I know if I decide not to have sex?

Contrary to rumor, at least half of all teens decide not to have sex.  Many teens are worried about hurting the other person's feelings, but it diesn't have to be hard to say "No" and still remain friends.  For example, you might say:

• "I like you a lot, but I'm just not ready to have sex."
• "I don't believe in having sex before marriage.  I want to wait."
• "I enjoy being with you, but I don't think I'm old enough to have sex."
• "I don't feel like I have to give you a reason for not having sex.  It's just my decision."

For more information or help, contact Darlyn Miller at Teller County Public Health: 719-687-6416.